Tipping...and I'm not talking about pushing cows over!

[justason]

Interesting. These original thoughts i have pondered before myself. I consider it dollar cost averageing. The water is free but they serve that.
If its a kids eat free night i'll add a value to that or add in the value of anything free to the tip percentage.

I dont give a hoot about social norms.
Tip before tax!!!!

Restaurant policy dictates if tips get shared or not
The only time i may throttle back is if the beers are big dollars or we order a bottle of wine.

We went to dinner last saturday. Out waitress was stoned so high and was so entertaining i tipped extra! I put her thru alot tho, she earned it. We placed our orders speaking backwards and repeating words like all was normal....poor thing

My son is a waiter.....i stiff him all the time

 

[BigN8]

Trick for cruise ship tipping. Don't prepay the tip when you book. However, on the first day aboard the ship go down And get a stack of the gratuity envelopes. Lay one of them in the counter or dresser in your roof so the staff sees it. Then they will know you have every intention of tipping and you'll get great service.

 

[cbus]

I have to say, this is an interesting thread.

I used to be a bartender and waiter at TGIFriday's. If you've never done these jobs then I understand not knowing that 20% is the norm or what the job typically requires. You are literally cleaning up after people all day, on your feet for hours on end, tons of work being done behind the scenes in the back of the house to make sure things are prepped properly, being told to get this and get that - most times without a smile only to receive a 10% tip on a $200 bill where the people sat and talked well after their dinner was done not realizing that they were taking that money making table away from another family that would tip better.

Tipping should be based on service first. If you have great service - especially today! - enjoy it and tip well. Also note that if you tip on a credit card that sometimes the restaurant won't tip until the next day when it clears - if you pay in cash it is always preferred.

Waiters do have to split tips amongst bartenders, bus boys, and sometimes door staff. This is while being paid hourly what most of us would never consider working for but because of certain laws, restaurants take advantage and pay less per hour so the tip is where waiters and bartenders make their money - it is not just an "extra"!

Next time you go out to eat, be kind to the waiter and watch where that gets you - when your finished with the meal, tip well ( at least 20% ) if the service warrants. Then, understand that the longer you stay at that table, the more you should tip as you are taking money out of their pockets - literally.

 

[Ronnie]

I still think about Steve buscemi's (sp?) line in the movie reservoir dogs, "why is it that some feel compelled to tip the waitress at a diner but not the staff at mcdonalds?"

Not to sound cold, but if they pay is crappy / tips variable you should know this going in, the solution seems to be find another job not expect better tips since working harder won't guarantee bigger tips. This from the perspective of a guy who has worked a lot of low level jobs in high school and college (e.g. bank teller, cannery worker, ditch digger, grocery bagger, family law intern/judicial extern), none of which were subject to tipping and some of which prohibited it (as a union grocery bagger it was against the rules to accept tips). Even worse, the internship and extern ship required me to pay the school tutuition to work in a job that paid nothing.

There is a five star restaurant called the French laundry in the napa wine country here in ncal. Instagram is full of pics of patrons receipts for $2,500 meals for two. Most of the big bills are the result of the wines ordered. No way in hell I'm coming out of there with a bill like that but if I did I wouldn't be leaving a $500 tip no matter how good the service. As stated in the first post of this thread. The service provider doesnt put anymore effort into opening and pouring a $100 bottle of wine than he or she would to open and pour a $1,000 bottle.

 

[cbus]

Ronnie, while it may seem easy to go find other low paying jobs, the fact is low paying can be subjective. Waiting tables isn't necessarily a low paying job, in fact, it can be quite the opposite however you do have to work hard for your money and it's a good lesson for future understanding of dealing with all types of people.

This is an age old argument that will never end. Everyone is different and thank God for that. The best advice is tip what you believe the experience was worth to you but keep in mind what was stated in my last post. I've been to many restaurants and wine bars where the staff really made the experience poor or great. I prefer the later so I tip based on that.

What you said above could be applied to visiting a restaurant, if you know it is expensive going in, the solution would be to go to a cheaper restaurant and avoid the tip discussion regarding expensive wine and meals all together. I prefer to go to a nice restaurant, eat and drink well and if the service is good, tip 20% regardless of the bill. I know this going in and plan for that additional expense.

 

[Jim Robeson]

@cbus ... some good stuff there. I've always tipped based on service...if I have problem with the meal, I take that up with the management. As long as the server takes care of us and isn't rude, I will leave them at least 20% and maybe a little more.

 

[sysinu]

I have a method for tipping. Everyone starts out at 20%. If they mess up and it's their fault, they lose 5%. If they own up to it, they get the 5% back. If they do something that makes me happy to be in my seat, they get 5% each time. Maximum is 50%. I usually tip around 25%

 

[Skysurfer2010]

I have to admit I'm surprised at some of the tight wads here! I'm going to assume the vast majority here live comfortably financially considering the costs of our toys. Not to mention many of you have shown pictures of your other toys and houses.

It's simple. If you don't want to tip don't go out. If you can afford a $200 dinner at a nice restaurant you can afford a $40 tip. If you don't want to leave an expensive tip then go to outback instead. Of course if the service is bad and you suspect it's the waiters fault then that's understandable to leave less, but unless I think it was done intentionally I'm not leaving less than 15%. They're paid crap wages and it's expected to be tipped. You know that going in, it's not like it's a surprise.

 

[cbus]

@Skysurfer2010 What you're seeing here is what is often the case. It's not that people are tight wads but they simply don't understand.

It's part of what Ronnie talked about above. There is a general misconception of what a tip really means to a waiter or bartender and every wait person understands this when they've been on the job for a while. In my case, I lived that life and as a result, I get it but I also understand those that never will.

I can honestly say I'm glad I had that experience and made friends that will last a lifetime but I would never want to go back to it because at times it can be extremely "thankless" or in some cases, "tipless"!

 

[rkluck]

Interesting conversations. I have several close friends that are servers and bar-tenders. Some locations split the tip some don't. That is up to the establishment. I tip based on service and start at 20% of the total before taxes (I have never even considered taxes as being included in my total). I don't tip when I just pick it up (no service - BTW - sometimes there is a fee for pick up). If the group stays a long time I will tip more since we are taking up a table which in fact would be anther tip opportunity.

 

[OCMD]

Right on, Skysurfer and Cbus. I always call a spade a spade. These low tipping cheapskates (sorry, I worked for years in restaurants) have no idea how difficult a job it is to be a waiter, especially at a popular, busy restaurant. They have no clue, and never will. They haven't worked in the field, so I don't blame them. Call me an outrageous tipper. If I have a $12 lunch, I'll drop a 20. What's 8 bucks to me? As my wife tells me, I wipe my butt with 20s. Who the hell cares about few bucks? If you can't afford to tip, and tip fairly, stay home. I can remember back in the late 70s early 80s when working my way through school, and someone would leave me 40 bucks on a 30 dollar check. I would be so happy because of the person's generosity. Ten bucks (25%) was sure alot more than $4.50 (15%) and when you are a 20 year old kid working to pay for school and rent, etc. that was a huge difference. That's how I will always look at it.
We now have a name for when we have to cover the tip for people who are cheapskates - and yes, we didn't know this beforehand and yes, it would be our last time out to dinner with these folks. It is called "Harrying" the tip. My wife will always ask, if someone else picked up the check, did you have to "Harry" the tip? My father in law Harry is the cheapest bastard around. I can remember my kids running up to the ice cream store with him on a hot summer day, while I parked the car. "Pop-Pop, Pop-Pop are we getting ice cream?" and the cheapskate, rather than delight two little girls with a $3 ice cream cone, would tell them "You will have to wait for your dad to get here when he gets done parking the car!" Anyway, I digress...... so Harry, on those very rare occasions 15 years ago when he would pick up a check, always deducted the tax. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? He would deduct the tax, and then round down 15% to the lowest dollar, and leave that as a tip. Whether the waiter was useless or superb, or anywhere in between, it didn't matter. The cheap bastard would deduct tax, and then round down 15%. To top it off, his wife was the biggest pain in the ass to the waiter - complained about everything and anything, every time out, and run the poor waiter ragged. So on the rare occasions when the cheapskate picked up the check, I would always wait until they leave, give a knowing glance to the waiter, and drop a 20 on the table, thus "Harrying" the tip. I'm glad that presently, none of my friends are cheapskates, and they all tip well, whenever we go out. If you don't? That's the last time I'll go somewhere to eat with you. Leaving crappy tips is like charging people for gas to ride in your boat. The epitome of cheapness. If you can't afford a boat and all that entails - entertaining others - then stay away from me. I just can't stand cheapskates. What the hell, I can't take it with me so I might as well spread a little cheer by tipping well. And the great plus? At all the regular places I eat, the servers fight to have me seated at their station, and you better believe I get the best service possible.

 

[Britboater]

I paid 20% at a restaurant yesterday , but the waitress was excellent and she remembered us from November and I'd like to go back and the food was divine!

 

[Jim Robeson]

I have always tipped on the full amount, not what it would be without the tax and I always do at least 20% as long as service was good. Sorry, not going to leave a descent tip if you have to ask for everything you ordered and I'm not going to tip just because I go out to eat. If you can't do your job right, find another job!!

 

[mark_m]

20% is the norm... Easiest to calculate after drinking.

 

[Ronnie]

For me its not about whether or not I can afford to tip it's more about whether I choose to or not. How much is another question.

So I've been trying to understand why, in the U.s., tipping is common for some services and not others. Based on what I've Read elsewhere online 42 of the 50 states have two different mimimum wage rates, one for non tipped employees and another for tipped employees. For example, in Texas the non tipped minimum wage is $7.25 per hour and the tipped wage is $2.13. I chose Texas because it was an easy one in that the state minimum wage is the same as the federal minimum wage and there are only two rates unlike ca where the tipped and non tipped rate is the same by law or newyork where there are several tipped wage rates depending on the industry.

From what I have read, Tips are supposed to make tipped employees whole by getting their average wages up to at least the minimum non tipped wage. That's a simple and understandable statement that holds water with me. However, it leads to another question which I could not find a simple answer to, why are patrons and not employers expected to make up this difference in pay ? I pose this question from the perspective of a person who has never had a job where tipping is a common or expected practice but also from the perspective of a person that prefers having a fixed wage instead of a variable income like a commission salesperson.

Interestingly, there is a lot of debate around tipping practices and whether it should be banned altogether. I'm all for eliminating the distinction between tipped and non tipped employees so there is only one minimum wage, even if it means prices will go up at some of the restaurants I eat at. Although I feel for anyone that doesn't make enough money, I don't feel like I should be obligated to make up the difference. In all the jobs I've worked wages are between my employer and myself. I get paid for my time as reflected in my work product, I don't get paid more or less depending on the perceived quality of my work, which is always expected to be exceptional. The consequence of consistently failing to meet my employers expectations of me is not less pay its job loss, plain and simple.

Until today, I've tipped where other people commonly tip and until recently I've used 15% as the baseline. Admittedly though often times I tip out of a feeling of obligation not appreciation for a job well done. That shit stops today for me, especially when the services are rendered here in CA since there is no distinction between a tipped and non tipped minimum wage. I don't care if I'm considered cheap or a tight wad and if I ever catch anyone harrying the bill/tip for me I will be the first to pay that person back and disassociate myself from that person immediately. I work hard for my money and I will spend it or save it as I like. Tipping is a discretionary practice and I'm going to use more discretion when I engage in it going forward.

Consider this, the u.s. Leads the way in tipping as acceptable and common practice where in other parts of the world it is frowned upon or banned. Why is that? Are we collectively just smarter than the rest of the world or is the opposite true.

 

[Jim Robeson]

I really didn't expect this thread to take off like this, but glad to read so many different perspectives. I started this conversation just on something that hit me the other day and I sure hope I didn't offend anyone, wasn't my intention. It's interesting that you, @Ronnie, bring up the tipped and non-tipped wage...that is what they do here in Missouri too. Someone here told me that a person that makes tips that their W2 reflects total amount of sales that person made through the year and that they can deduct a percentage as tips...or something like that. I work hard for my coins but I don't mind giving someone a little extra as long as they are polite and get the job done right.

 

[GiddYupJoe]

Too funny. My kid started crying so I politly removed my self from the restaurant and came to the car. Been here for 20 min waiting in the wife... Reading the post about tips and this is the texts that come from my wife inside!

 

[Murf'n'surf]

That's when I stand up and walk to the hostess and say "I'm sorry, my waiter disappeared and I have 2 minutes before I leave. Can you cash us out?"

 

[biglar155]

...I would always wait until they leave, give a knowing glance to the waiter, and drop a 20 on the table...

Reminds me of the time a new equipment vendor took us out to lunch at one of our regular spots. Not a high-dollar place, just a ratty old bar with the best dang pulled-pork sandwich you'll ever have in your life. Usually the bill, tip, and all for one guy is around $15 and you're so stuffed that you can't move.

Well this vendor (who said he was FINE with the idea of the place after we explained it wasn't exactly up-scale) was a total pain to our (regular) waitress. I've seen people be a little fussy, but this guy was "That Guy" you know? And you could tell that he's "That Guy" all the time. It came to naturally to him.

He paid the bill, so we're not sure how well he tipped, but we assumed it wasn't much. As we were getting ready to leave, the 3 of us that were with him looked at our waitress and said "We're really sorry about him" and we each dropped a $20 bill on the table.

The ride back to the plant was silent and we never called him back.

I'm not going to do business with someone who treats people like that.

 

[cbus]

@Ronnie I think you find people pointing at you or you are finding yourself in the description of people that others have referenced. I don't think that is the case.

Tipping is a choice, just like working at one of the jobs you have worked in the past or currently, if you want to be paid well, do a good job and be rewarded by, in your case, keeping your job. In the case of the waiter, it is a matter of making rent or not so their choice should be simple, be a great server, get great tips and prosper.

The benefit to you is better service and lower cost of goods because the restaurant will usually charge less as employee costs are also lowered. Although that doesn't apply in all cases, tipping forces people to be good at serving.

Quite frankly, I think you would be well served to get a job as a waiter for a month or two. I think only then could you possibly appreciate the hard work they do and what a tip means to the one who receives it.